he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
