Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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