And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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