So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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