This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
My legs feel like baby dolphins
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
