O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
