Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
