the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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