He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Randomize
