FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
