Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
