yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize