You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
