I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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