He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
i think i just lost a toe
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
