We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
