Is it because I queefed?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
When did angry sex become our thing?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
