So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
she looked like the before picture.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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