You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
