brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
