I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
