making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
