it wasn't lemon gatorade
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
