I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize
