are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Let's paint friendship bongs
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
