How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize