fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
