Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
