five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
