You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
