i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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