You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
