Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
