so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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