I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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