come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Randomize
