Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
