You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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