I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
