yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
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