So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
