I can tuck mytits in my pants
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
