69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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