Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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