I just pynch a tree in the face
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
