i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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