The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
