I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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