He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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