if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize
