yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
